tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-45896053798737326672024-02-19T02:07:09.205-08:00 the shedding of a former selfkathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.comBlogger171125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-86567222345874122192012-12-12T22:59:00.000-08:002012-12-12T22:59:09.279-08:00Ellen Gilchrist Quote"We cannot get from anyone else the things we need to fill the endless terrible need, not to be dissolved, not to sink back into sand, heat, broom, air, thinnest air.<br />
<br />
So we revolve around each other and our dreams collide. It is embarrasing that it should be so hard.<br />
<br />
Look out the window in any weather. We ae part of all that glamour, drama, change, and should not be ashamed.<br />
<br />
- Ellen Gilchristkathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-70408567096614341082012-12-11T21:37:00.000-08:002012-12-11T21:55:12.786-08:00untitled<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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a scare</div>
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the edges of a bathroom</div>
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the sweet rhyme of a paper hospital gown</div>
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flattened, padded with everyone’s unease at your unease</div>
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<br /></div>
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let’s pretend to be honest</div>
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<br /></div>
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marching in place</div>
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one, two, three, four</div>
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<br /></div>
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this condition is not like dying or death</div>
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it is like a white flower</div>
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something to get lost in </div>
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something to bury the flesh of your desires</div>
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<br /></div>
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this condition is more like the guilt </div>
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like a schizophrenic </div>
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except no one knows what their own skin feels like on the
inside</div>
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until it hurts</div>
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<![endif]-->kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-47201175058945628132012-07-26T22:17:00.001-07:002012-07-26T22:19:51.308-07:00random words that came to me while riding the busEveryone admires my boyfriend<br />
because he gets stuff done<br />
himself with no help <br />
from anyone.<br />
<br />
I've always been attracted<br />
to that sort of man;<br />
the one that gets stuff done<br />
with his tongue,<br />
his hands.<br />
<br />
The scream in his throat<br />
and the fear in his heart,<br />
<br />
that's my man,<br />
mine, <br />
my heartkathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-66932726767396212422012-07-24T23:26:00.000-07:002012-07-24T23:35:53.226-07:005:30 p.m.The office empties <br />
and the sun <br />
shines brighter <br />
through the open window.<br />
<br />
The wind <br />
breathes fall<br />
through the leaves of the trees. <br />
<br />
A train caws against the rail.<br />
A tree swallow calls out <br />
to the clock that tick<br />
tocks away time.<br />
<br />
I finger my button <br />
in a circular motion.<br />
<br />
The time has come.<br />
The time has come.kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-10478944904515219472012-07-24T21:31:00.001-07:002012-07-24T21:31:14.745-07:00JulyThe sun got lost today
<br />
This day in July
<br />
This day that is summer
<br />
This day in Portland
<br />
Everyone wears shorts
<br />
Or dresses
<br />
In the rain
<br />
This summer daykathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-84631517156568568742012-05-21T23:22:00.003-07:002012-05-22T16:01:13.353-07:00RecordingPasswords<br />
And pin numbers<br />
Secret questions<br />
And answers<br />
There is so much<br />
You don't know<br />
About mekathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-65466632804780882132012-05-17T23:12:00.001-07:002012-05-17T23:12:30.714-07:00AugustI sit comforted in my spanish harlem room. The gray rainy skies compliment my pale blue room. The breeze feeds my need for coolness and solitude.
The heat from the last three weeks brought with it a mania in me. I went out every night doing nothing and everything.
Now I rest my tired feet and mind.
My manic state collapsed.
It all began on a Thursday night....kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-3727687689392399072012-05-09T22:49:00.000-07:002012-05-10T16:07:15.191-07:00pillow tree girl<br /><br />
Swinging lips<br />
Fall from trees<br />
And hips<br />
They arc upright<br />
In the night<br />
<br />
We talk<br />
Because<br />
That's
what we're<br />
Supposed to do <br />kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-75482800348581521122012-05-04T13:41:00.000-07:002012-05-04T13:41:03.111-07:00trueyou see<br />
these words<br />
they mean so much to me<br />
<br />
the words<br />
are the only<br />
something<br />
true for mekathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-24711990127386128642012-05-04T10:07:00.003-07:002012-05-04T13:30:57.241-07:00InteriorsMy tears are dry like the desert<br />
Tumbleweed gifts<br />
For the strangers I meet<br />
The Russian man<br />
At the corner bus stop<br />
Every downtown morning<br />
We share secret smiles<br />
We breathe our helloskathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-30895802321372617642012-04-25T22:50:00.001-07:002012-04-30T12:25:21.889-07:00two peas in an edamame podI ask you again about the dog today<br />
To see what you will say<br />
To remind myself<br />
What it is exactly that we are telling ourselves<br />
<br />
We make a tent with our sheet<br />
And watch our legs<br />
They look the same as they did<br />
Five years agokathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-49809862115033478092012-04-24T16:05:00.000-07:002012-04-24T16:05:28.275-07:00Getting There<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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The fat man with the French accent behind us taps the
white exterior of the plane as we board: Do you think it’s good? We can
hear his voice above the quiet hum of the other passengers. Don’t move. I’m not
as fat as you think, he says as he straddles his way across hips and skirts to
the aisle to adjust his bags. We smile, but we don’t laugh. We are clouded with
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<br /></div>
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Long, winding electric rivers pulse like hardened
arteries. No water, only cars pass by strings of strip malls that swallow up
any sign of life. The hospital - an oasis of potted plants and grass and warm
sun and vendors selling food that smells like carnival. A scene that conjures
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Your face is hollow and your left side droops and you
talk like you have a cigar hanging from your mouth. Your lips unable to make
words that sound like you. But your skin is smooth like cream and your hair as
white as pearls and you are beautiful. You hold my hand and say: so glad you
came.</div>kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-40333114027602778322012-04-24T15:59:00.002-07:002012-04-24T15:59:50.446-07:00questionFrom my friend Mike:<br /> <br />
How many wake up calls have you had? <br /><br />I know I've had plenty.<br /><br />How many did I listen to?<br /><br />Not nearly enough.kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-50807185357863034822012-04-23T07:50:00.002-07:002012-04-23T08:11:13.472-07:00secondhand viewing of what was mineYou want to stop at that store. You are looking for a pair of work pants. We have been through this before. I paw through the racks of secondhand shawls and you sweep the store for Carhartt pants.<br />
<br />
I watch a woman with a child pick up a sweater I sold to this store last week. She holds it up and makes her decision. That sweater of mine has lain across my bare breasts sometime between summer and last fall. <br />
<br />
I stalk this woman with my eyes as I finger t-shirts and scarves. I try to get you to look as she puts my sweater in her bag, but you don't really care.<br />
<br />
I am happy to see someone want my sweater; the one I purchased from a local girl at a tiny store in Wisconsin.<br />
<br />
This has happened to me before. At a bar New York, in the bowels of Chinatown dancing on a drunken summer's night, I saw a girl dancing with my mint green leather hand bag. In my disbelief I confronted her.<br />
<br />
In her Irish accent she confirmed where she had purchased the bag and asked me why I gave the bag away. For a second, I had no idea.<br />
<br />
I was happy to see that bag again; the one I purchased from a souk in Fez.<br />
<br />
<br />kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-22594179921182603742012-04-21T23:58:00.001-07:002012-04-23T07:20:46.980-07:00QuestioningIs it a poem?<br />
I don't know<br />
I guess<br />
I really don't carekathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-83682262613824073792012-04-21T23:54:00.001-07:002012-04-23T07:23:47.577-07:00BedsideThere are five poetry books on my nightstand table. Two are independent publications, the kind I think of myself as liking.
One is a book of poems by an author I admire for a single poem. Another is a book of "erotic" poems that bore.
The book I turn to night after night while the others collect dust are the words of
Tomas Transtromer.kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-72240267802155954482012-04-20T00:22:00.001-07:002012-04-23T07:26:51.807-07:00Night NothingsOne cloud passing<br />
My kitchen window<br />
I stand getting water<br />
Midnight black April eve<br />
Passing thoughts ribbon<br />
Through still irises<br />
Seeing tomorrows<br />
Their smiling promises<br />
That lie beneath<br />
Sleeping souls<br />
<br />
Restless for a moment<br />
A feeling affirming yes<br />
This cup you hold is real<br />
Tonight is the nightkathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-83889508996293125912012-04-19T00:06:00.000-07:002012-04-23T07:27:09.611-07:00random thought #864We are all obsessive creature beasts at heart doing the same things over and over again.kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-26231716844847071412012-04-18T00:11:00.000-07:002012-04-23T07:28:21.887-07:00subconsciouslyFeather-like depths of the heart<br />
Like sticky steps <br />
Shoes and feet get stuck <br />
In the act of stepping<br />
<br />
Burr-like memories bristle<br />
Hooking consciousnesskathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-44423504609108418882012-04-16T23:14:00.001-07:002012-04-16T23:15:45.202-07:00Surfacestonight we made a decision<br />
not to go anywhere<br />
for nowkathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-66885754236669366402012-04-15T22:01:00.000-07:002012-04-15T22:01:04.209-07:00thinking of my sister"Children of the same family, the same blood, the same first associations and habits, have some means of enjoyment in their power, which no subsequent connections can supply."<br />
-Jane Austenkathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-26301539096446029212012-04-12T00:08:00.002-07:002012-04-23T07:28:33.701-07:00Wake up callThis is your life. <br />
Life<br />
Yours<br />
Wake up!<br />
This is your f'ing life!!kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-67111558988698491262012-04-10T22:44:00.000-07:002012-04-10T22:44:09.573-07:00Our WorldIt brings me <br />
such joy<br />
To hear you laugh<br />
Really laugh<br />
Your head tips backwards <br />
All your chompers showing<br />
Eyelids closing<br />
Eyelashes dancing<br />
Strange pecking noises<br />
Rising from your throat<br />
And to think<br />
All I had to do<br />
Was play for you<br />
Biz Markie's song<br />
"Pickin Boogers"kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-74261118187939298082012-04-09T23:33:00.000-07:002012-04-23T07:31:41.907-07:00PleasantriesThe second day in a row that we have not turned the heat on. The breeze from the window settles the dust of winter in this house. A reminder that spring is here. You smell of bath salts and the candle smells of lavender. Spring joy. Joy Spring.kathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4589605379873732667.post-87580710582466480742012-04-02T23:11:00.000-07:002012-04-02T23:11:53.120-07:00bedtimeStrings of sleep catch us<br />
Wrapping fingers along <br />
Dreaming thoughts<br />
Cocooningkathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06409353632067108468noreply@blogger.com0